10 Tips for Songkran
Even though the Official New Years Day is April 15, and the official day for Songkran in my city is April 19, festivities get underway today. That’s Thai style – any excuse for a party! It’s time to break out the Songkran checklist to make sure we’re prepared.
1. If you go outside, you will be involved in a water fight. If you don’t want to go play, this morning might be your last chance to go to the store and buy enough supplies to stay in your house like a hermit for a week. If this is you, you suck.
2. If you must travel, try to walk or take the public pickup taxis. Motorbikes are recipes for disaster. I’ve seen some gnarly moments happen when water spray meets driver’s face.
3. If you wear contacts, buy goggles. You will not only have water in your eyes, but gooey paste made from talcum powder and water. Usually it’s gently applied to the sides of the face, but as alcohol and excitement take hold, it usually finds it’s way into you aural and ocular cavities.
4. Bring your happy face. There is no excuse not to have a good time for the next week.
5. Only bring outside what you need to survive. Leave your passport and your full wallet and wristwatch and other important things at home. If you must bring a cel phone or money outside, wrap them in ziploc bags.
6. Wrap your cel phone in a condom and tie the end off like a balloon. It’s the only thing guaranteed not to leak. Plus, if your cel phone has lost a bit of its sheen over the year, the lubrication with naturally oil up the plastic and make your cel phone look new again.
7. Don’t be an asshole. Foreigners are notorious for playing aggressively and forcing people to play. Try not to hurt anyone with your giant water cannon, and if you feel the need to make someone have a good time, follow the Thai style and splash a little water from a bowl instead of unloading a firehose stream of ice cold holiday cheer right in someone’s face.
8. Solicit the establishment you’re playing with. If you shack up at a shop or a bar and use their water supply, buy some drinks or chip in a little money for the water or ice. Sure it used to be free several years ago when people were using cereal bowls and small water guns, but now each bar might go through 500 gallons or more in a day to repeatedly fill up your 3 foot cannon.
9. Sunscreen. Sunscreen. Sunscreen.
10. Start booking your trip for next year. Compare this list against some lists to prepare for other new years lists (which party, which champagne, which dress, who to kiss, blah blah blah) and you decide which one sounds more fun. I gotta go, I still have to buy my Hawaiian shirt……
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